Perfectionism and Anxiety and Recovering from that Mindset Hi, I’m Tabitha and I’m a recovering perfectionist. I say recovering because it’s an ongoing process, sometimes a rather frustrating one if I’m being honest. Perfectionism is sneaky. It disguises itself as high standards, as diligence, as caring deeply about doing things well. Before you freak out […]
Interrupting Negative Thoughts: Your Mind Is Not the Boss of You
Interrupting Negative Thoughts When I was a kid I had opinions. I know this is utterly shocking for those who actually know. Shocking. And I remember saying to another kid who wanted me to do something I did not want to do on the playground, “You’re not the boss of me!” Our thoughts can for […]
How to Deal with Suffering and Pain: Stop Making an Advanced Purchase
“You can’t buy a ticket for a train that’s not at the station. This isn’t like vacation where it costs less if you buy it in advance. You don’t even know if this train is coming. That is not how to deal with suffering and pain. Or, shall I say, possible suffering and pain.” I […]
The Fawn Response and the Difference Between Niceness and Kindness
Being a “Nice Girl” and the Fawn Response One of my supervisees said something to me once that I haven’t stopped repeating since: “nice girls end up in trunks.” She wasn’t being dramatic. She was naming something super real; something a lot of us learned the hard way. We learned the habit of being endlessly […]
Why Hope Isn’t an Outcome, It’s an Anchor
What is Hope and How is it Not a Swear Word? Hope is one of the most overused and misunderstood words in healing spaces, yet it holds surprising depth when we stop tying it to outcomes and start treating it as a way of seeing. Today we’re exploring hope as a lens grounded in reality: […]