Written by Gwen Soat, LCMHCA The Lost Child Family Role If you grew up feeling invisible in your own home, you may have taken on what’s known as the lost child family role. It’s one of the most overlooked patterns in dysfunctional family systems, precisely because the lost child causes no problems and asks for […]
The Switchboard: Dysfunctional Family Roles and the Child Who Held Everyone Together
Written by Gwen Soat, LCMHCA Dysfunctional Family Roles – Were you the Switchboard? Like we’ve been talking about, every family has its roles. Some are assigned. Some are inherited. And some are quietly learned because a child sensed that someone had to hold everything together. Among the most misunderstood dysfunctional family roles is one we’ll […]
The Family Fixer Role: How Childhood Trauma Creates the Need to Fix Everyone
Written by Gwen Soat, LCMHCA Are you in the Family Fixer role? You Might Be in the Family Fixer Role If… You have become the “therapist friend” or the “fixer partner.” You feel guilty choosing yourself or your own needs if it makes someone else upset. You struggle to say “no.” You anticipate problems before […]
The Family Scapegoat: Understanding the Black Sheep Role and How to Heal
Written by Gwen Soat, LCMHCA You Might Be the Family Scapegoat if… You feel like the black sheep in your family. You are blamed for problems that were never fully yours. Your mistakes are remembered longer than anyone else’s. Your successes are minimized, ignored, or picked apart. You feel emotionally excluded from your own family. […]
Grooming in Adulthood: How It Shows Up in Love, Friendship, and Work
By Gwen Soat, LCMHCA Grooming in Adulthood When we think about grooming, we often picture child victims and adult perpetrators. But grooming isn’t limited to children; it’s also a key factor in the abuse many adults experience. It can sometimes be difficult to separate genuine kindness from coercive tactics, just like it is with childhood […]