Precise language matters in when talking about abuse dynamics – and the term “narcissistic abuse” in terribly imprecise.
In today’s world, mental health conversations have gained significant traction – THANK GOD. It’s about time, to be honest. A topic that often arises is “narcissistic abuse.” While abuse awareness is crucial, understanding and using accurate terminology is even more important for the sake of survivors and advocates alike.
I’m Tabitha Westbrook, a licensed trauma therapist and expert in domestic abuse and coercive control. Today, we’re going to explore why “narcissistic abuse” is not be the right term and delve into why “coercive control” absolutely serves survivors better. If you’d rather listen to the podcast – click the YouTube video below!
The Problematic Nature of “Narcissistic Abuse”
The term “narcissistic abuse” is becoming a bit of a catchall. Although it resonates with many, it doesn’t accurately depict the complex dynamics of abusive relationships. Here’s why:
- Misleading Diagnostic Implications: Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a mental health diagnosis. Not all individuals who are labeled as narcissists meet the criteria for this diagnosis, and not all of them are abusers (I know that might seem wild!).
- Legal and Advocacy Challenges: Courts require precise and actionable language. Labels like “narcissist” aren’t helpful in legal settings and may set the victim at opposition with the judge. Descriptive terms like “coercive control” have a much more solid legal precedent and can lead to better outcomes for survivors. Since 90% of abuse victims also experience post-separation abuse, much of it through the courts, this is a big deal!
- Overused and Diluted Meanings: The term “narcissist” is excessively used in popular media, diluting its original meaning. This overuse can trivialize and oversimplify the seriousness of abuse dynamics.
- Pathologizing Survivors: “Narcissistic abuse syndrome” tends to focus on the symptoms witnessed in survivors instead of the behaviors of the abuser. This inadvertently shifts the blame towards the victim, reducing their credibility in legal or social settings.
Embracing “Coercive Control”
The Essence of Abuse:
Coercive control lies at the heart of domestic abuse dynamics. It represents the systematic entrapment of an individual’s independence, self-esteem, and autonomy.
Legal and Professional Language:
Coercive control is recognized in various jurisdictions as a legal term with definable and research-backed elements. This precision not only aids in legal matters but also paints a clearer picture of the abusive behavior.
Empowering Survivors:
By highlighting the coercive elements of abuse, survivors gain a framework that better explains their experiences without pathologizing them. This provides them with the vocabulary needed to articulate their experiences, especially in legal contexts.
Why This Matters
Choosing the right language isn’t just about semantics and we get why the term “narcissistic abuse” might feel accurate to a survivor! It matters because it’s about ensuring survivors of abuse receive the support they need and that advocates have the tools necessary to bring about real change.
If you realize you’ve been or are a victim of coercive control, we’re here to help. We specialize in helping clients heal. Reach out today for your free, 15-minute consultation! Don’t suffer one more moment!
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