Choosing a trauma-informed therapist to help you work through traumatic events can sometimes feel like a traumatic event itself! If you’ve ever had a terrible therapy experience, you may be a bit gun shy to even try again! We get it!
Lots of individuals overlook the critical step of finding the right therapist for trauma recovery. Ensuring that you connect with a therapist who truly understands the complex nature of trauma, particularly when it comes to domestic abuse and coercive control, is essential in your healing journey. In this post, we’ll discuss the critical factors to consider when choosing a truly trauma-informed therapist, share insights on what makes a therapist effective, and provide real, actionable steps that empower you to take control of your healing process. By the end of this guide, you’ll have a clearer understanding of how to find a therapist that can walk with you on the journey and process of healing.
Understanding Trauma and Its Effects
Healing from trauma isn’t just a matter of time or thinking your way out of it; it requires an understanding of how trauma affects the mind and body and soul. Let’s be real, if you could just think your way out of it you wouldn’t even be here reading this guide!
Traumatic events affect people differently and how it’s affected you is unique to you. Your journey starts with recognizing your impacts, which can include emotional distress, chronic anxiety, or difficulties in relationships. You also may notice impacts to you body – we call these somatic responses (“soma” means body). These are physical responses to the trauma. We’ve worked with clients who experience autoimmune disorders, nausea, joint pain, and all kinds of other things due to the trauma they’ve experienced. Understanding your personal impacts will help you articulate your needs and expectations when seeking therapy. And a good trauma-informed therapist will know how to help you even identify those impacts – it’s super common not to fully know them when you start healing!
What Makes a Therapist Trauma Informed?
The landscape of therapy is continually evolving, especially concerning trauma recovery. It’s essential to find a therapist who not only has the proper qualifications but is also actually trauma-informed. Taking a single or even a couple courses on trauma is insufficient. The field of trauma work is vast and growing as we learn more about the brain and body. Things like interpersonal neurobiology and epigenetics are game changers for how we understand impacts of trauma on people – even across generations. You really want to look for therapists who have specialized training in trauma. Some good training to look for are Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), Brainspotting (BSP), Somatic Experiencing (SE), Internal Family Systems (IFS), or Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART). These modalities have been scientifically proven to assist in the healing process for individuals who have experienced trauma. There also is great value in Narrative Focused Trauma Care (NFTC), which can be included with any of those others. In fact, a solid trauma-informed therapist likely has been trained in more than one of these modalities! If domestic abuse/coercive control is part of your story (or you think it might be) it is absolutely essential the therapist has been trained in that specifically. Many therapists think they “understand” abuse and they don’t, which creates significant danger for the client.
The Importance of Compatibility
Not every therapist is the right fit for you. Some are more directive, some are less directive. Some are more “blank slates,” some will provide more feedback. You may have a preference on what style works best for you. No therapist should tell you what to do – period. It’s not their life. For folks coming out of abusive spaces where they’re used to being told what to do, it may feel very weird not to be told what to do – but I promise you, learning to use your voice is incredibly healing! A great trauma-informed therapist knows this and will encourage you in finding your voice!
It is incredibly important to find a therapist with whom you feel comfortable discussing sensitive topics. You need to feel safe with this person and feel like they hear you. A strong therapeutic relationship fosters trust and openness, which are absolutely vital for effective healing. That doesn’t mean you won’t feel anxious at times or emotional as you work through the deep healing, but you should feel like your therapist is a safe person to do the work with. If you line up ten therapists and only one is a good fit – pick that person.
Evaluating a Therapist’s Experience
When searching for a therapist, evaluate their experience and expertise. Ask about their history of working with clients who have experienced the type of trauma you have, especially if it’s domestic abuse and coercive control. A therapist who is familiar with these issues can better understand your experiences and provide the necessary support. You can always ask things like, “How were you trained? What outcomes have you seen in your clients? Tell me your understanding of domestic abuse and coercive control.” Don’t be afraid to consider an intern. If they’re supervised by a skilled trauma-informed therapist it can be an amazing, lower cost way to engage in healing!
A solid trauma-informed therapist will always be happy to answer your questions. You are not a burden asking – this is your therapy. You have every right to make sure it’s a good fit!
Assessing Therapeutic Approaches
This might seem repetitive, but different therapists utilize various approaches to therapy. An approach is a perspective a therapist comes from. What is their basis? For example, at The Journey and The Process, we come from a systemic perspective – we want to understand your world and all its parts. From there, we generally take a somatic-based approach to therapy because the body keeps the score as it relates to trauma. We do engage the cognitive because it’s also important, but we do it from a more embodied approach.
It’s beneficial to explore the methods and techniques a trauma-informed therapist employs and they should be able to explain it much like we just did above. It’s also helpful to ask about their treatment plans: Are they structured? Flexible? Will they adapt their techniques to meet your specific needs? What if you have questions about your treatment plan? How open are they to such questions? The best answer here is they should be very open!
Setting Clear Goals
Establishing treatment goals at the start of therapy can guide the process effectively. The therapist should partner with you to set goals. Some clients really don’t like goal setting, which is fine, but there should be some agreement on the trajectory of therapy. This will not only help set a pathway for your sessions but will also give you a sense of direction in the healing journey – and help you know if the therapy is effective. Goals can and sometimes do change or evolve as you work through trauma and you should be welcome to adjust them with your therapist!
Utilizing Supportive Resources
In addition to therapy, consider incorporating supportive resources like trauma-informed life coaching, peer support groups, or educational workshops that focus on recovery. There are some great ones out there! For example, you may have done some deep work and processed a lot in therapy already and now you’re ready for some additional life changes. A trauma-informed life coach could be exactly what you need! We offer that at our practice so we can help folks in different spots in their healing journey. We also offer groups for various topics, from healing a broken faith after trauma to healing from sexual harm. These can be great spaces to not only heal, but to build or rebuild healthy community with people who understand the struggle! Different seasons of healing need different things. If you haven’t done therapeutic healing work, we do suggest starting there first.
Understanding Costs and Accessibility
It’s important to be aware of any costs associated with therapy upfront. All therapists should be clear on fees. You should never, ever be surprised by a charge. If you will be using your health insurance you need to know if the therapist is in network or not. If he/she is not, then you will be required to pay up front and submit a bill – called a superbill – to your insurance to see if they will reimburse some or all of the cost. As unfun as money conversations can be for some folks, they are important so you can plan appropriately.
Life is busy and it can get lifey. Getting to a therapy office can be tough. If accessibility is a concern, inquire about teletherapy options. For some folks, the best therapist for you might be hours away. Being able to do video sessions can give you access to the perfect care for you while mitigating distance. We strongly advise against using a therapy platform – think the ones that seem to advertise on every YouTube channel or podcast. They are deeply problematic and do not protect your data (one platform was fined heavily by the government for this failure). A more local therapist who does telehealth is a much better option and will protect you and your data far better.
The Role of Faith-Based Counseling
For individuals who value faith as part of their healing journey, exploring therapists who provide faith-based counseling may be beneficial. This is a really important place to ask some theological questions. Asking how a given trauma-informed therapist incorporates faith is vital so you know if it’s a fit for you. The best answer is, “I incorporate it however you would like.” We know in our practice how spiritual abuse can harm faith practice so we are gentle and the client directs any such incorporation. When God or Scripture has been used to harm it is vital for the client’s needs and desires to be prioritized! A good trauma therapist also will be open to you wrestling with your faith as you heal. That’s a normal part of the healing process!
Signs of An Effective Therapist
Throughout your journey, it’s crucial to recognize signs that your therapist is effectively guiding your healing process. Signs include feeling progressively more comfortable discussing your feelings, noticing shifts in your perspective regarding your trauma, and feeling empowered in your recovery journey. It’s not uncommon to also feel like some things are harder – you’re going to be looking at and working through hard things. Grief might surprise you, but it makes an appearance for most folks as they heal. It’s not super fun, but it is part of the process. If at any point you feel your therapy isn’t progressing, it’s essential to openly discuss these feelings with your therapist. Your therapist should welcome those discussions and either adjust or help you find a better fit.
Testing the Waters
Don’t hesitate to have a trial period where both you and the therapist assess the fit. It’s absolutely fine to see how it goes for a few sessions. No good therapist has a problem with that either! We want you to have the help you need and if we aren’t it, then we want to help you find it! Your therapy is about you – not the therapist. If you feel uncertain after a few initial sessions, it is perfectly okay to seek out other options. Therapy is a personal journey, and finding the right match is vital to ensure progress.
Between-session Techniques
While working with a therapist, you can also explore between-session techniques to support your journey. This can include journaling your experiences, practicing mindfulness exercises, deep breathing, and setting daily intentions. Integrating these techniques into your daily life can enhance the therapeutic work you accomplish in sessions. We often give these types of activities as “homework” to help you build on recovery between sessions and to help you build in habits that help you for a lifetime. The goal is true healing and life change so we want to help you on that journey between appointments and this is one way we help you do that!
Where to Find a Qualified Trauma-informed Therapist
One of the best ways to start is to ask friends who they see and like. Take a look at those therapists’ websites and see if any feel like a fit for you. Another tool is Google – search “Trauma therapists near me” or “EMDR therapist near me” or “Trauma therapist [MY STATE]” and put in your state. Then, check out websites and reach out with any questions you have. Any good trauma therapist is happy to answer your questions. We want therapy to be a good experience for you!!
You also can search online directories, such as Psychology Today, or specialized websites focused on trauma recovery. I will say, not all therapists are on these directories (our practice is not), so don’t forget to Google!
Social media platforms and community organizations often have lists or recommendations for local mental health professionals who are trauma-informed, as well. Your church may even have a list of therapists they recommend. Any resource can be a jumping off point for getting ideas and then reaching out to see if a therapist is a good fit for you.
What Questions to Ask a Prospective Trauma-informed Therapist
We’d love to help you know what questions to ask! Click here to get your free questions guide!
Next Steps
We hope this guide is helpful as you embark on your healing journey! We specialize in working with men, women, couples, and kiddos who have experienced trauma. If you’d like to see if we’re a good fit for you, we’d love to chat! Book a discovery call with us today! Click the link below and let’s help you heal!
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