Becoming a police officer isn’t just a career—it’s a calling.

You’ve passed the interviews, survived the Academy, conquered the fitness exams, and now you’re ready to wear the badge as a police officer. Answering this call is courageous, but too many officers neglect one critical piece of preparation: mental and emotional resilience.

You’re training to protect others—but who’s protecting you?

The Cost and the Calling: What Police Academy Doesn’t Teach

The law enforcement journey begins with adrenaline, purpose, and pride—but also brings hidden dangers like depression, anxiety, burnout, and PTSD. The Academy prepares you physically and tactically, but mental and emotional preparedness are just as vital.

Dr. Kevin Gilmartin, author of Emotional Survival for Law Enforcement, famously notes, “Most police agencies train new officers to be sprinters and then enter them into a marathon.” You may be trained for tactical survival—but are you trained for psychological endurance?

Understanding the Hypervigilance Roller Coaster

In police work, hypervigilance is essential for survival—but it comes with a cost. Police officers are taught to treat every encounter as potentially dangerous. This state of constant alert taxes the nervous system and creates a cycle: high alert on duty, emotional crash off duty.

Gilmartin calls this post-shift low a “vegetative, off-duty phase.” Over time, this emotional whiplash can erode your relationships, sleep, and sense of self.

Key Statistic:

The average police officer experiences 178 critical incidents over a career—compared to just 2-3 for the average person [4].

Suppressing emotions to stay composed at scenes can lead to emotional numbness, and many officers turn to unhealthy coping strategies: alcohol, isolation, or misplaced aggression.

Worse, police officers face:

• 2–4x higher rates of PTSD and anxiety
• A higher risk of substance use disorders
• Suicide rates 3x the national average [3,4]

“It’s part of the job,” many say—but it doesn’t have to be.

Mental Health Preparation for Police Officers

1. Know Your Triggers

Triggers are cues—sights, sounds, memories—that spark emotional responses. They’re deeply personal and can make you feel powerless or unsafe. But identifying triggers gives you power. It helps you respond instead of react.

Recognizing physical (tight muscles, rapid heartbeat) and emotional (fear, anger, anxiety) signs of being triggered allows you to stay regulated and in control—even in high-stress moments.

2. Strengthen Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence (EI) is your ability to understand and manage emotions—yours and others’. For officers, EI is critical for de-escalation, decision-making, and leadership. Like firearms or tactical skills, EI takes intentional practice.

• Emotion regulation—naming what you feel (“name it to tame it”)—reduces overwhelm.
• Mindfulness techniques like grounding, deep breathing, and body scans help officers stay present, focused, and calm under pressure.

3. Build a Support System Before You Burn Out

The time to get a therapist isn’t after a crisis—it’s before. A trauma-informed therapist helps officers process experiences, build healthy coping skills, and prevent long-term damage.

• Therapy is not weakness—it’s self-protection.
• Strong communication with your partner or spouse is also vital. Officers face higher rates of relationship conflict and emotional disengagement [1].

Don’t wait until it’s too late—invest in your mental health early.

Healthy Habits: Leave Work at Work

Law enforcement culture often breeds isolation, but life outside the badge matters. Maintain relationships beyond the force. As retired NYPD officer Graham Campbell puts it:

“Keep your old friends.” [2]

Your badge is part of you, but not all of you. You are also a parent, friend, spouse, athlete, artist, or bookworm. Claiming your identity outside the uniform helps your nervous system learn when it’s safe to rest and recover.

Over-identifying with the job (“I am a police officer” vs. “I work as a police officer”) can lead to burnout and emotional disconnection. Learn to flip the switch between duty and downtime.

Final Word: You Are More Than the Uniform

The job will take what you give it—but it’s your responsibility to set the boundary. You were not built to carry trauma indefinitely, but you can build resilience. You don’t have to lose yourself to answer the call.

Let’s protect you—just as you protect us.

Are you a first responder realizing you need some support? 

The post Police Officer, Hold the Line: Mental Health Strategies for Aspiring and Active Law Enforcement appeared first on Tabitha Westbrook.

Why did you decide to become a therapist?

I am passionate about helping individuals, children, couples and families. I love assisting people with embracing their brain health and developing healthy, functional patterns.

What is your favorite thing about your work with clients?

Seeing the “lightbulb” and hearing the “aha!” go on when a client finds insight, awareness and peace in discovering the power within him-/herself.

What is something you wish people knew about counseling in Wake Forest?

What would you like to say to someone who isn’t sure whether counseling can help them?

Have you tried it? We all need tools to fill up our tool box to get through the peaks and valleys of life….the beauty of counseling is that YOU, the client, get to choose how you want to be helped. (If you need help knowing what to ask a potential counselor, we have blog posts here and here that can help).  

Share a fun fact about you:

I lived in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.

Kristen is located in our Wake Forest counseling office and sees clients both in person and via secure, HIPAA-compliant video. Kristen has some evening hours as well for those who are negotiating work or school schedules. She specializes in working with children (including young children!), teens, couples, and families who are struggling with relationships, anxiety, overcoming past or present traumatic experiences, or struggling with identity. For kiddos, she uses play therapy and you can learn more about that here.

If Kristen sounds just like who you’ve been looking for in a counselor, reach out today at 919-891-0521 or click here to schedule your free, 15-minute consultation for counseling in Wake Forest, NC or online within NC. You will be so glad that you did!

The post Wake Forest Counseling – Meet Kristen appeared first on Tabitha Westbrook.

How to pay for counseling without insurance in Wake Forest NC.

You know finding the counseling in Wake Forest NC isn’t always the easiest process. Counseling is an investment in you and you need to find the right person and place to invest in your time and energy.

You know it’s something you need to do, but the amazing counselor you found doesn’t take insurance. Or you may not even have insurance. Or your insurance has a deductible that’s so high you’ll never meet it in the calendar year. Well, darn. How do you pay for counseling without insurance? We have some ideas for you!

Awhile back we did a blog on some options – you can read that here. Some of my clients told me they couldn’t do some of those things due to transportation issues or family constraints. I’ve been on the lookout ever since to find some options that will work if you have just a computer and a few skills. Here are some additional options for making enough money per week to cover the cost of amazing therapy – and maybe even set some money aside for other things!

Try transcription or captioning.

Rev.com allows you to become a freelancer and watch videos and type what you hear. Simple as that. It pays pretty decently, too! On the low end, at $0.45 per video minute, you can make $27/hour. If you work 10 hours per week, you’d make $270. So, that could be two hours when you get home from work, after the kiddos are in bed, or even in the morning if you get up a little earlier. And, if you can translate another language you can make even more.

Try being a virtual assistant

There are a lot of folks who own small business who need some administrative help. If you have a good grasp on something like Microsoft or Google products, you may be able to make some money helping them get things done. Upwork is a place where you can find projects on which to work. A quick search of available jobs turned up things like copying/pasting data from an email database into an Excel spreadsheet for 10-30 hours per week. Others included typical admin duties. Pay was between $13-$25/hour. Let’s say you worked 10 hours per week making $20/hour as a virtual assistant – you would bring home $200. Easily enough to pay for therapy.

Can You Really Make Counseling In Wake Forest, NC happen for you?

At the end of the day, you will make it happen if it matters to you. Counseling is an investment in you, and you are worth that investment. If you are ready to invest in yourself and the only thing standing in the way is finances, these ideas can help you get where you want to go. We really hope these new tips give you more ideas for how to pay for counseling without insurance.

If you think we might be a good fit for you, reach out today at 919-891-0525 for your free, 15-minute consultation for counseling in Wake Forest NC.

The post Have You Seen the Cost of Counseling in Wake Forest?? appeared first on Tabitha Westbrook.

Am I struggling with something or do I need clarity in a relationship or other area?

Counseling could be really helpful. Running it by someone who is skilled at helping folks figure things out can really help you get the clarity you need or see an issue differently than you may have before.

Have I tried all I know to do and am still coming up short?

Sometimes we just can’t think of all the aspects of something and we need to talk it out. Counseling can really help you do that and help you come up with some new things to try or help you shift your perspective on a situation. Unlike a friend or family member, counselors don’t have a preconceived idea of the issue or of you.

Have I been through something really hard/awful that I’ve never told anyone or that I’ve never really addressed?

There are things we experience or that happen in our lives that are big deals. It could be sexual assault, being abandoned or abused by a parent, being in the military or law enforcement (or any first responder), an abusive relationship/spouse, or a host of other experiences that leave a mark. Sometimes people feel like they’re walking through life broken or like something is “off”. Counseling can help you heal from these hurts and live the life you know is there, but can be hard to find.

Have I had counseling for an issue in the past and that issue is coming back up?

That totally happens sometimes. I see it a lot in clients who have experienced sexual abuse or sexual assault. Dan Allender in his book, Healing the Wounded Heart, talks about it being like layers of the onion that sometimes need to be pulled apart at different times as we grow in our healing. So many people say, “I should be past this by now!” when the reality is it may just be time for the next step in the healing process.

Am I about to get married?

Premarital counseling can be unbelievably helpful. Therapists skilled in this process really help couples look for and address issues that can trip them up later. A good counselor can also help you learn skills that will serve you for decades. The average couple waits until they have been having issues for SIX years before they get help. You can save yourself a lot of heartache by starting off right and getting help along the way as needed.

Is my marriage in trouble?

A good couples/marriage counselor can be incredibly helpful in getting a marriage back on the right track. Even if situations that are really bad like a spouse having an affair occur, if both parties are willing to work on it healing can come. We have seen many marriages recover from incredible struggles and

Are you struggling in parenting your kiddos? 

Children don’t come out of the womb with an owner’s manual, though that would be super cool. There are some hard things parents have to figure out and a good counselor can help you do that. They can help you and your kiddo relate better and help you build stronger relationships. If your kiddo has a disability or challenge, it can be even harder on parent. Counseling can help you cope with the challenges.

Are your friends/family members telling you it might be good to get counseling? 

Sometimes our friends and family see us struggling and they feel powerless to help. They may suggest you see a counselor. If that is something you’ve heard from someone you care for and trust, it may be helpful to take a look at whether counseling could be helpful for you.

We hope this helps you answer the question, “How do I know if I need counseling in Wake Forest?” If you read these and thought, “Well dang, I fit one or more of these” we want to help! Reach out today at 919-891-0525 for your free, 15-minute consultation. We’d love to see you for counseling in our Wake Forest office!

The post How Do I Know if I Need Counseling in Wake Forest? appeared first on Tabitha Westbrook.

The answer might just be yes – thankfulness can keep you from needing counseling in Wake Forest!

Did you know that a practice of giving thanks – sometimes called gratitude – can actually help you reduce feelings of anxiety and depression? If you practice gratitude regularly you may find you don’t need counseling in Wake Forest – and if you do need counseling it might not be as long!

The Science

Giving thanks (gratitude), no matter what form it takes, is associated with happiness. Expressing our gratitude also can support long-term relationships. Not only can gratitude boost your mood and strengthen relationships, but it also can improve your physical health. Research shows that practicing gratitude helps improve sleep and increase energy. It also shows that gratitude can be an “natural antidepressant” releasing dopamine and serotonin into the brain, which boosts mood. There is even evidence that maintaining a gratitude journal can reduce pain. Research conducted by HeartMath found that positive thoughts – like gratitude – can actually stop the physiological stress responses. There is even more information on how the practice of giving thanks can positively impact the brain structure, and this article is really great if you want o learn more!

The Practice

Here are some amazing (and easy!) ways to practice giving thanks so you can reap the amazing benefits this practice holds!

1. Gratitude journal – No need to be all fancy here (unless that’s your jam). A simple notebook is sufficient. Take a few minutes each day to write down at least five things for which you are grateful. It can be literally anything, even “I’m grateful I had enough gas in my car to get to work today.” Even on the worst days there are at least five things to be thankful for. If you’re afraid you’ll forget, set an alarm or reminder on your phone.
2. I Appreciate – Tell someone three things you appreciate about them. You can appreciate anything – even the day-to-day stuff that you’re thankful for but never comment on. For example, if your spouse or child takes out the trash you can say, “Thank you so much for taking out the trash. I appreciate it.” I know you might be saying, “But it’s their job to take out the trash. It has to be done anyway.” Yes, that is true, but you are still grateful because it’s done and now you don’t have to worry about it. We practice this one with couples all the time. It is amazing to see how it changes and strengthens relationships to simply be appreciative.
3. Say “thank you” – Most of us are conditioned to do this, at least a bit. But do we thank everyone? Do we actually mean it when we say it? Make it a practice to genuinely thank the cashier at the grocery store, the person helping you at the DMV, and the kids for finally picking up their socks.
4. Pay it forward – When you can, do a random act of kindness. That can be as simple as picking up litter you find or as elaborate as paying for the person’s order behind you in line at Starbucks.
5. Write a note to a friend – You can do this on actual paper or through a text or email. There is a lot of value in actually doing it on paper. It slows your brain down and uses a whole different processing mechanism than an electronic format does. If you mail the note to the friend that can be really powerful and meaningful. How awesome is it to get mail that isn’t a bill or junk?
6. Thankfulness jar – Get a mason jar and some small slips of paper. Starting on Thanksgiving, and then daily thereafter, write down one thing for which you are thankful. Have each family member do it with you. Next Thanksgiving you’ll have 365 reminders of the good things you experienced throughout the year.

The art of giving thanks is one that can have a huge reward for those who practice it – maybe even keeping you from needing counseling in Wake Forest. If you’re feeling stuck and not sure how to even a thankfulness practice started, we would be happy to chat with you about counseling in our Wake Forest office. Reach out today at 919-891-0525 for your free, 15-minute consultation.

The post Thankfulness Instead of Counseling in Wake Forest? appeared first on Tabitha Westbrook.